Letting Go

Two songs have really been ministering to me lately. I’ve been working through some things in my life; praying on certain situations and really trying hard to let other things go and happen on God’s timeline. I’ve been working hard on learning more patience and trusting God, and I often have to remind myself that the past is the past and I am not helping myself to question the decisions He has made regarding my life. He has blessed me in the past, and if he never blesses me again, I’d still praise Him.

The first is Fred Hammond’s “Give Me A Clean Heart

The second is Dwayne Woods’ “Let Go, Let God

Time always manages to fly by when you’re living life. I have been watching Z more and more these days. My baby will be 5 years old in a matter of months. He’s lost pretty much all of his baby fat and has the regular, “anti-shape” of any other big kid. He runs, he jumps, he talks non-stop, and the kid has a memory like an elephant (which is offset only by his total lack of a concept for time).

Being in California, we have a December 2nd cutoff date for school – Z’s birthday is in October. So, after much wavering back and forth, and really paying attention to his progress in preschool, I’ve decided to send him to Kindergarten this fall. Dun-dun-duuuuuuh…..Now the question is “which one?”. What school do you send a little Black boy to in the midst of the Valley? Public vs. private? Public vs. charter? Charter vs. private? What kind of diversity is there? What kind of extra curricular activities are available? Year-round vs. regular schedule? The whole process is quite dizzying. 

There are three public schools out here that I would love to send him to. However, they’re neighborhood schools, and we don’t live anywhere near those neighborhoods. But we do need to move, so being in those areas would be nice. There’s also three really good charter schools to consider. Unfortunately, we’re wait-listed at two of them, and the third is really far out of the way of where we’d like to move to.

Right now I feel like I haven’t really gotten anywhere, so who knows where my kid will be next fall…maybe still in preschool at this point. Which I suppose is alright with me, since I wouldn’t care if he never grew up. I’d be happy for him to stay a “baby” forever – shhh! don’t tell him I called him a baby!


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